What’s in it for me? What’s in it for him/her?
To make any change is to give up one thing in favor of another. To commit to a long term intimate relationship means abandoning a “single life” in exchange for a life of partnership. Most people do not happily abandon something unless they feel they will gain something better in return. “More pain and less gain” is never an inducement to make any sort of change. Answering the following questions about yourself ( and about your partner if you are currently in a relationship) can help you to see the ways in which changes in behavior might make commitment a more attractive proposition in your relationships.
|These are some of the needs I can fill in my partner’s life:||1st These are the ways that I could do this best. (2nd: These are the ways my Partner feels I could do this best)|
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